Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Dear Khalel

"wash away my tears"

Dear Khalel,

Hold your breath and don't look down.
Just take it one story at a time.
It's really not so hard.

Sometimes screaming will help you keep the insides inside. There's no turning back, all you can do is hope they'll be there to catch at the bottom; but they won't, and it's never a soft landing. And after you hit the bottom, fracturing every bone, everyone expects you to just tough it up and walk away. But you can't even move your toe, let alone walk.

Everyone passes by so casually; barely even noticing your mangled body laying there. You almost want to laugh but your jaw is lying on the pavement beside you, which makes it a little difficult.

"Take the fall, it's worth the risk."

Just be thankful that you can't see yourself like this. The system is suspended in limbo, the power is on but there's no response. And all that's left is to shut it down and move on.

Khalel, be strong. Be very Strong.

I will be your strength,


Wednesday, July 22, 2009


"But you see," said Roark quietly, "I have, let's say, sixty years to live. Most of that time will be spent working. I've chosen the work I want to do. If I find no joy in it, then I'm only condemning myself to sixty years of torture. And I can find the joy only if I do my work in the best way possible to me. But the best is a matter of standards--and I set my own standards. I inherit nothing. I stand at the end of no tradition. I may, perhaps, stand at the beginning of one."

- ayn rand

Thursday, May 28, 2009


ive lost my concentration.
this outburst of emotions,
this uncontrolable surge of pain,
words seemed to be far away,
and im left here, silenced.

this feeling that wont subdue,
id really hate you if this is untrue.
you stare at me like im the only one.
we both know im not.
but why such pretention?
why such love?

is this cowardice we both manifest?
or is it only i that make matters worse?
you've got someone else beside you.
i've got no one.
love fills me when you speak.
but dried tears well up when the two of you meet.

my jealousy is void,
for you and i, there has never been US.

-khalel zantillan
May 29, 2009

Wednesday, May 20, 2009


The average; norm.
is there such a form?
Forlorn; torn between a sole journey
and the sojourn of the soul.

The final visionary,
overtaken by solemn undertakings
as serene reality, overshadowed by unreal premise
trickles down, abandoned by discontented minds.

Silenced murmurs echo unchecked,
obscured among lost footsteps of dissident spirits.
Lighten prospects through unenlightenment;
Quench the thirst for reality with tears of confusion.

Shaded nuance and veiled subtlety;
forsaken graces of humanity
when fear of individuality
overwrites morality.

-khalel zantillan
i forgotten how sweet the black tears taste.
rekindling the dying light, beckons: I am home.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

We're Back!


After 7 months of hiatus, we are back online! Now with a new link, but still with the same feel.


Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Live, Love, and Unite with PRIDE. MARCH!

Manila Pride March 2008

Fairies and Pixies. Hansels and Gretels.

Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals, Transgenders and Friends...

Fly to Malate on December 6, 2008, Saturday, and be part of the grandest Rainbow event in Philippine History!

1PM - Registration at Remedios Circle

3PM - Parade (Remedios Circle - Pedro Gil - Orosa)

6PM - Program and Pageant (Orosa)

10PM - Party at Orosa St.

Put on your best fairytale and fantasy costume and join the grandest Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) event of the year: the 2008 Manila Pride March.

For more details, visit the 2008 Manila Pride March Official Website!

(Feel free to copy and paste and re-blog or share via email this post! Click here to copy HTML code for easier reposting)

LGBT Bloggers for Manila Pride March 2008!

I would like to personally thank Red Box for graciously sponsoring the LGBT Bloggers' Night last Sunday, November 16 at Red Box, Greenbelt 3.

Also, I would like to thank Joyce Pogoy and GeiserMaclang for helping us make this event happen.

And of course I'd like to thank all the LGBT Bloggers and their friends for coming and having fun with us!

For those who missed it, we know there was something else more important that you had to attend to, and we completely understand.

Congratulations to Yffar and Rainbow Bloggers Philippines for the launch of the group blog.

Congratulations also to the winners of Delifrance and Red Box GCs and domain names (courtesy of BaklaAko.com, of course hehe).

But the party and the fight is not yet over. The Manila Pride March 2008 is almost here and we still have a lot of things to accomplish!

It is in this light that we are inviting (once again), all LGBT bloggers (and supporters of LGBT causes) to join us as we represent our online community in this year's Pride March. We will be scheduling another get-together and meeting before the end of November so we can all discuss how we will represent our community at the Pride March. We already have a budget for the rental of the truck we will use for the float.

What we need now is commitment from everyone to join us on December 6 as we represent the LGBT Blogging Community at the Pride March. We need your help, support, and participation so we can tell not only the online world, but also the rest of the universe that we are here, we are queer, and we will stand up and fight for our rights!

The registration form for the LGBT Bloggers for the Pride March can be found below:

You may also register via this link: http://spreadsheets.google.com/viewform?key=pBMbzxkhfXMIuzVyY2lcDNg&hl=en

Please feel free to pass the message and/or copy-paste this entry and the form. We need all the participation and the help we can get! (If you are not out but want to join the march, we can certainly accommodate you and we already have some ideas as to how you can join us!)

Mabuhay tayong lahat!